Girl wind flying in her face

Many emotions are welling in me. The turmoil of being emotionally cheated on seems slightly overpowering. I turn back to Pema Chodron’s teachings, and the words of Rumi. In the midst of darkness, is it possible for me to feel love for the other — still? How does healing take place, and where should it start?

Before we can love another, we need to face ourselves in the mirror and love the one we see reflected back at us. The soul — that is the gateway to understanding mysteries of life that span beyond words. The self — so incredibly resilient yet fragile. What an oxymoronic statement. But one never exists without the other. If we don’t understand brokenness, we will never understand fullness. If we don’t understand anger, we will not understand betrayal. If we don’t understand sadness, we will not understand happiness. If we don’t understand chaos, we will not understand peace.

When there’s a birth of something, there will be an imminent death. We never know when, how, why, what. We know that it’s a cycle — birth and death, birth and death. Almost everything on this planet comes into existence with that theory. But how do we make peace with death? When will the tears stop to cascade down our faces, and the gaping wound of our hearts mended? How do we fill that empty space? Is there even an empty space? Or did we make that up? Can we become whole again, after losing that thing that has found it’s way to death? Why do we have to experience such cycles?

Perhaps that’s a mystery in life. The teachings say that it can help us learn about compassion and empathy, and to learn how to love without attachment. I’m back to reading the Gita, but I’m not even 1/123908 through it.

I think it is possible to choose love in the midst of a heartbreak. If your heart is full, full of love for self – you will be able to pass it on to another even though the other has broken you to bits. Love is possible. But it also requires a gigantic amount of courage sprinkles.

I pray to be strong. I pray to love the person I see in the mirror – strongly and fiercely. I pray to love those to have broken my spirit relentlessly – for they must be broken themselves to want to break someone else. I pray for universal love for all.

Photo credits: Pinterest